Whoever Forces His Daughter for the Sake of Money Must ...

 

As a critical thinker, let me briefly poke my nose into Bossman and Alam's business. This is not to disintegrate their feelings but to cultivate a sense of acceptance and belonging. Let's keep in mind that I don't know either of them, except for Bossman, whose name sounds familiar in the country's entertainment industry. Juba can provide more insight about him.

Last week, the social media frenzy, of which I'm a part, erupted over Alam's disappearance from home, allegedly due to eloping with someone. Due to the heated search and concern from feminist groups and humanists, Alam's search gained significant traction, aimed at helping Bossman recover his partner.

Surprisingly, Alam stepped forward and clarified the situation, denying the elopement allegations. She revealed that she left home because she didn't want a marriage she wouldn't enjoy; essentially, she ran away because her parents were pressuring her into marrying Bossman against her will.

Here are three areas of concern:

The Power Balance between Bossman and Alam. A serious man should understand the woman he wants to marry. Familiarity does not automatically qualify someone for an intimate relationship. The relationship between Alam and Bossman was significant, and both being part of the elite community highlights the need to respect feelings in marriage. Bossman’s failure to understand the feelings of Alam is an indignity.

The Communication Strength. Effective communication is crucial. Bossman's approach seemed to lack open discussion, which surprised Alam and led to her resistance. Perhaps he went directly to Alam's parents and signed the marriage certificate without prior communication. Did you see that the reason Alam went into hiding?

The Family Influence. In modern society, forcing marriage in the name of culture is outdated. Forced marriage is not a genuine cultural practice; it is a form of control. Alam fought for her freedom to choose her partner. Parents should respect their children's autonomy and understand that the system of forced marriages has long been outdated.

To every parent out there, let us accept change and respect our daughters who have inadulated feelings like ours. Whoever forces his daughter for the sake of money must be prepared to bury the corpse of the daughter. Wise men speak in proverbs and not in prose. Otherwise, praying for Alam's peace in her marriage.

 

Ayella John Bosco

Writer, Critic, and Teacher.